Thoughts on Recovery
Lately, I have been recommending the book "Eating in Light of the Moon" to many of my clients recovering from an eating disorder. It is a powerful book of metaphors and analogies that help people consider the root causes of their dysfunctional relationship with food and their body.
One chapter in the book that really stood out to me was chapter 19 entitled "Recovery. Out of the Labyrinth". In this chapter, the author shares the classic story of The Ugly Duckling. The poor duckling was told by her family and many of groups of animals that she was ugly and a misfit, resulting in a great deal of bullying. Defeated and discouraged, this duckling started to believe something was indeed wrong with her because everyone seemed to think she was so ugly. That is until one day the ugly duckling stumbled upon three beautiful swans. The ugly duckling thought for sure she was going to be rejected yet again by these animals, but to her surprise when she swam out to them she realized that she was a beautiful swan and not a duck at all! She had found her home and that changed her perspective altogether.
The story of the ugly duckling is a powerful one. It helps us see that sometimes our perspective is skewed based on what other people have told us. Perhaps people have told us we are an odd and ugly duckling, not realizing all the wonderful traits we possess. Many people who have struggled or currently struggle with an eating disorder feel out of place like they don't belong with their friends and family. They may be extremely intuitive, sensitive, and have a knack for reading between the lines and that may make some people around them uncomfortable. To quote Anita Johnson, the author of "Eating in Light of the Moon", "Recovery from disordered eating requires that a woman come to terms with the uniqueness of her being." In other words, recovery means coming to terms with and owning what makes you who you are. Maybe you are truly empathetic towards others and feel things deeply. Maybe you have no desire to pursue the 9-5 career ladder. Find out who you are and embrace it. Just because it is different from someone else does not mean it is not beautiful.
